God is faithful, even when I'm not.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us RUN with perseverance the race marked out for us.  Let us FIX OUR EYES ON JESUS, the author and perfector of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.  Hebrews 12:1-2

That, may be my favorite verse of all time.  It is always good  to remember all God has brought you through.  Oh I so easily forget!  You know, I still drive around Minnesota and think, wait..... I'm in Minnesota??  I had forgotten all the miracles that God did to get us here.  So I read them again, here.  I'm so glad I did, because I have been really wondering why we live in this frozen tundra.  I've been saying... this weather is not fit for humans!  We must be insane to live here!  I really, really do not like winter.

But, I'm so very thankful.  I have many things to praise God for.  This Minnesota life is not perfect but we are blessed to have it.  I want to keep my eyes FIXED ON JESUS.  I pray God will help me throw off all that hinders and not be entangled in sin.  Thank you Lord for all you have done for me!!

Defining Chaos

Really, what is the definition?  I imagine it is moving into a new home in a new state.  Wait I do have my dictionary unpacked and right here......
Chaos: a state of utter confusion or disorder.  YES!  that describes it perfectly.  We have seemed to hit every bump along the way, but I am still grateful and in awe of God's awesomeness!  We drove out to Minnesota in a motorhome with our 3 girls and our two big dogs.  Motorhomes are not my fave nor are dogs in a confined space, especially when they shed and happen to get wet.  More on our trip next time, today I wanted to show you a few pictures of when we FINALLY arrived in Minnesota...

OH happy day when I saw the Minnesota sign!

Our boys flew to MN early to start jobs and unload two trailers we sent out early.  Hubby and I decided since we had the wood floor refinished and sawdust was EVERYWHERE, we would have a cleaning company go in and give the house a good scrub.  It was a foreclosure and the previous owners did a lot damage before they left, so a thorough cleaning was in order.

I arrived thinking I was going to be able to go right in and unpack since the cleaners did the hard work for me.  WRONG, I got in the house and literally burst into tears, the kitchen was disgusting, sawdust in every cupboard, caked on food in every cabinet.  The cleaners had been there 3 times already!  We had them come back a 4th time, and they still didn't do a good job!  We won't be paying them. 

So I called my sister to let her know we were in town and had a mini breakdown and told her I was on my way to Target to buy cleaning supplies to clean.

She came right over to help and we spent the next 4 hours scrubbing the kitchen and unpacking kitchen stuff.

And this is the crew that helped us our first day.  All my nieces and nephews, my sister and her husband and my dad and his wife.  We ordered some pizza's for dinner.  Not everyone is in the picture.



Thank you Lord for sisters.  We sat down on the dock for a rest.  It is so good to see my kids play with their cousins.

My niece, Jenna, and Portia.  Catching snails in the lake.

I sure do miss my bloggy friends, I hope to start reading your blogs again soon!  I feel such a sense of urgency to start sewing again.  I only have 2 months till The Creative Connection Event and I MUST GET SEWING!!

But I don't feel like I can sew until my house is in order.

And it's not......

This is our dining room, which is where I'll be sewing.  We have way to much stuff, which seems crazy.  This house is a bit bigger than the farm, but much less storage space.  I have to have a garage sale!

Ok, I must continue unpacking and organizing!  Please tell me what you have been up to??

I really am still
Alive!! We finally arrived in Minnesota and are trying to get settled. The moving truck was supposed to arrive tomorrow (Friday), but now it's not coming until Monday or Tuesday!
But I can't complain, we have a roof over our head, made it here safely, and I've seen my family and best friend already. I'm typing on my phone now, so will be happy when the computer arrives, and my sewing machine!
I am going to be selling at The Creative Connection Event again this year, so I must get sewing!
Will write when were settled. Sure do miss blogging.

A happy picture!

We finally have a "sold" under our sign!  Yippee!!

We leave in 5 days.

Thank you Lord!

The Move part 5

If you have not read The Move parts 1-4, find them under the label "The Move".   I left you with "THE CONVERSATION".  Hubby and I were on a walk, which is when we have most of our important conversations, hubby says  "I know I'm going to regret saying this, but......." and that is what started it all!
 Hubby had taken a boys trip to Minnesota with our sons last summer and talked with my dad about our property, nothing unusual, but one thing led to another and the wheels started turning.  So hubby told me his "plan" that day on our walk...... If we could get this much for the farm and find a house for this much, then I could find a new career, maybe go back to school, whatever, etc.. etc....  It snowballed from there and before you  know it, we were here. 

We started looking for homes in Minnesota online, and we found one that seemed to have everything we wanted and we decided to try and buy it.  But God was not having that and it just didn't seem like the wisest move.  So we let it go.  And boy am I glad we did, because just 4 months later it had gone through foreclosure and we ended up getting it for over $100,000 cheaper than it had been in the fall.
Thank you Lord.  But buying it was not an easy process, (aka: trying to get a loan when your home is for sale, government red tape on a foreclosure...).  At times we thought, are we losing it?  are we out of our minds???  After all, there has not been even one showing on our farm, but deep down we knew God was going to sell our farm and we knew this was God telling us to move, so we took a leap and bought it.
WHEW, that's over.  Now we wait for the farm to sell.  We waited and waited and waited. And I'll tell you what, I was a basket case, just ask my best friend, she listened to me fret and despair almost daily.  But she always had an encouraging word and prayed for me.

So one day I told God, or rather, I asked God, if it was his will, I would really like to be in Minnesota as soon as the kids are done with school.  I wanted them to have the whole summer to have fun and get to know their cousins again before the new school year. But I just didn't see how God was going to accomplish this!  I mean that was in April and I knew it would take a long time to close on the farm and would if the buyers had a home to sell?  How was this all going to happen???!!!

But sure enough one day we got an e-mail from our realtor saying, I have a couple flying up from California to see your property, on April 30.  We were so excited we could hardly stand it!  That was two weeks away, how would I get through those two weeks?  Would if they didn't want it, then what??

Maybe it's time to start listing the miracles God has done through this whole process.

MIRACLE: hubby and I being on the same page about going back to Minnesota, how about me even wanting to go back..?  Yes that is a true miracle.

MIRACLE:  after we decided to put the farm up for sale, hubby gets a call from a previous customer in Minnesota offering him a job!  They drive their motorhome out for service even though they could have gotten it done in Minnesota and we have dinner and discuss the position.  Customer says, I believe God sent us out here to talk to you.

MIRACLE: God provides an incredible deal on a forclosure.

MIRACLE: my oldest son is able to transfer with UPS to Minnesota, a position opened up  in the EXACT TIME FRAME we needed.  (unheard of)  Oh, we flew him out Friday June 3, and he just started today!

MIRACLE: the buyers are cash buyers, no need to wait for them to sell a home or get a loan.

MIRACLE:  buyers are willing to close early and let us stay on the farm rent free till the kids are out of school.

MIRACLE:  God answered my time frame prayer, it is TO THE DAY, the exact time frame I wanted!

MIRACLE:  we have a home to move into, no apartment needed till we find a home.

They are endless, I tell you ENDLESS!    Glory to God for all of this, for all he has done!  And it's not because of anything I am or have done, nope... I am just a sinner saved by his grace.   I am not super spiritual, I haven't stepped foot in a church in almost 2 years.  God is just good.

Thank you for all of you who wrote to me and told me you were praying...it helped more than you know!

We are driving back and we leave June 16, the day after the kids get out of school.  So I may be absent for a while, so we can pack up and ship out! 

Thank you Jesus.

The Move~part 4

Where were we?  Here is part 1 and part 2 and part 3.............
I left you with this post and said more on that later.  So in September of 2010, I was asking myself, Lord, is that you?  Oh how I wish God would audibly answer those questions, but he does not.  So I was forced to just trust and "go with it".  I should say we, because hubby was in this too. 

When we moved to Oregon from Minnesota I could not have been happier, I had always wanted to go on a big adventure like that and move out of state.  Well it was truly an adventure, I had severe culture shock arriving in Eugene.  But we really grew to love this place, so much so that I began declaring over the years that I would NEVER leave Oregon, not for ANY reason whatsoever, not even if something terrible happened to my husband and I was left out here all alone......NEVER EVER would I leave such a beautiful place!  I am a little over an hour from the coast and the dunes, two things which are my world favorite's!  The mountains here, which they call hills, are just a wonder to see everyday.
Not to mention, we left behind us: freezing winters, misquitos, gnats, tornadoes, humidity, boring flatlands, Minnesota accents.  Well I don't realize I still have that last one, but everyone still says to me, you must be from the midwest....
So imagine my suprise and shock and horror when in late 2008 or maybe 2009, I began hearing things.  I began to have this super tiny, quiet, still small voice in my mind saying.  minnesota   I would just brush it off and not think twice, cuz honey this girl ain't EVER going back there!  Oregon is it.  And a month or so would go by and I would think.............what would it be like to go back to minnesota  I just could not figure out what was wrong with me, thinking these things.  Because I would literally feel devastated even thinking about having to go back there.  That is how much we both love this place. 
Hubby and I would say to each other,  do you think we will ever go back to Minnesota?  And we were both so adamant that, NO, NOT EVER, NEVER will that happen!!!!  We PROMISED each other we would always stay in Oregon.

***disclaimer**** to my family... Of course I missed you all terribly, my heart would ache that I could not go shopping or to lunch with my sister and that my kids could not go to grandpa's house for a visit, and not to forget my best friend, I missed her so very much. 

So I never said a word to hubby about these whispers because I knew they were just passing thoughts and nothing more.    I wonder if God will ever send us back to minnesota someday?  Nope, I knew that answer right away.  Even in September of 2010 after I got back from The Creative Connection Event in Minneapolis, I said to hubby, ugh, yuck, I do not want to go back.  This was after hubby and I had "THE CONVERSATION" that opened the floodgates and we both knew the second the words were said, that we had crossed a line.........more on that in part 5.  I was in such    minnesota   denial.
All during 2009 and 2010  the events of my other posts, begin to happen and I am not linking anything together in my mind at that point, because I am not giving those tiny thoughts any time of day, because it's not what I want. 
But a real turning point for me, was the Lord, is that you? post.  It altered the way I think, to say the least and slowly everything started to make sense.....only STARTED to.  I do not understand God or his ways.

There has to be a part 5 because, hubby and I, well we thought this was all going to go rather smoothly and easily.  I mean don't things go smoothly when your in God's will?  Or you THINK your in God's will .....right??  Were the whispers of    hawaii   the ones I was supposed to be listening too?

The Move~part 3

If you missed it, here's The Move part 1 and The Move part 2...........Ok so part 2 wasn't really about "the story", but I called it part 2 anyway.

Well the closing has already moved from May 31 to June 1.  Not bad, only one day, but I don't like that.  I don't like it one bit.  This is such a huge ordeal for us that I want each and every detail to stay neat and tidy in the appropriate boxed section it was meant to be in!!

PLEASE no more changes, PLEASE!  But, alas, I know there will be more changes to come, little bits of testing.  Shall I call them "opportunities to grow"?  Or how about "character building"?  Or should I just stick with my "lessons"?
And why do lessons have to be so darn painful?  I am getting off track, lets continue..........

Almost a year ago, I wrote this.  Now some of that angst, I knew, I knew, I knew was God.  So that gave me a sense of peace.  I don't know how I knew it, but I did, in the pit of my being, I knew my changing relationships were God doing something, something BIG.

So on the one hand I was crying weeping over changing friendships and leaving my church,  but on the other hand in my spirit I was excited, thinking ok, God would not be doing this, unless big changes were coming!

OH     little did I know.

So not even a month after I wrote the above linked post, I wrote this.  More on that, in The Move part 4.

The Move part 2 Goodbye part 1

You can't move without saying goodbye can you?  The sun is out today and as I walked out back to see just how warm it was the realization hit me...............I have to say goodbye to all this.  And while we want to move and believe we are in God's will by moving... it does not make it easy.
And I am starting to count "my last's".

This is THE LAST time my hubby and son's will put out the irrigation.  Yes, yes, yes, we have had our fair share of arguments over farm work and how it's done, actually SEVERE arguments over this issue, but it is still a bittersweet last.

Goodbye small pasture, you are bumpy and full of ruts from the cows, but we faithfully irrigated you to keep you green and growing.

Goodbye beautiful view of the "hills".  I will miss you most.  In the soon to be 9 years we have lived in Oregon, I have never tired of these hills, it has never grown old or just....oh ya there are the hills again.  Nope I have thanked the Lord thousands of times for how beautiful they are.

Goodbye magnolia trees, I have enjoyed the huge saucer blossoms every year.  Although my children have not enjoyed picking up your leaves day after day.  I don't care, I love you!

Goodbye passion flower vine.  You faithfully came back every year from new shoots that started.  I finally had to make  up a huge trellis for you out of an old bedspring and an old barn gate.  I sure hope the new owners keep my set up!

Goodbye bush, I don't know what you are called but I love you too, you are my favorite, especially when your branches bloom with tiny yellow flowers!



Goodbye river rock path, that I painstakingly put in one rock at a time, while I was 8 months pregnant with Sophie!!  You are my favorite too.  That is why I planted you with steppables, my favorite plant!

Goodbye river rock.  We brought you up load after heavy load from the McKenzie river.  I wanted to do so much more with you, like build a river rock wall out front.......sigh, that is not to be.

Bittersweet from websters says:  2. both pleasant and painful or regretful: a bittersweet memory  5. pleasure mingled with pain.

I'd say that sums it up perfectly.

The Move~ part 1

I have waited so long to be able to say these words, and those of you with a house for sale KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING!!!  I have several blogger friends that are selling, have just sold or have moved into the new house and are still waiting to sell the old.  It is a gut wrenching, hand wringing, trust testing, emotional experience, no?

Well, here goes......we are closing on our farm on May 31, and I would really like to be able to tell this story in that time.  But it cannot be in one post, there are to many miracles to share.  And when I say miracles I'm not talking parting the Red Sea kind, it's the little occurences, that you almost have to do a double take to make sure you read/heard/thought right. 

Now, mind you, there are HUGE things occuring here, but it's the little things that are the biggest sometimes.  I am going to link up to old posts now and again, because God has seemingly woven this tale together over quite some time and I hope I don't lose you as I am trying to tell it.  It is all there in my mind, but sometimes I don't convey my thoughts exactly right.  I have to remember that you have no idea what has been happening.  I've wanted to shout it from my farmhouse rooftop, and at times whine and complain about all this waiting and trusting. OH wait I did whine and complain didn't I?

I have experienced Mt. Everest highs and Death Valley lows in the last few years, I say few because honestly I don't even remember when this all started, but the further into it I get, the more I realize, God started this process long before I had any notion of it at all!

Remember this post?  This is a precious gift from God.  It may be neither here nor there as to what is happening now, but I did always wonder why God sent us to Oregon.  I don't know if this is only part of the reason or the whole reason, but it meant the world to me to discover this.

And that is where I'll begin........